Friday, November 6, 2015

Serendipity...Sort Of

I’ve been getting hit in the face lately with a lot of truth bombs. It’s that whole serendipity thing, but not in a fortuitous way. The universe is speaking to me and it is telling me I’m not fooling anyone.

The other night I read (in the most random crime short story from the 90’s) a passage where the author, talking about drug addiction, wrote:

"Sometimes a man quits trusting his strengths and starts trusting his weaknesses. His weaknesses are more apt to be dependable"

Yeah, that blew my mind.

Then I was reading this post from Andie Mitchell over at CanYou Stay for Dinner and she was talking about goals and making big changes that are impactful and when I got to this part:

"Sometimes when we feel stuck, any movement feels good. And while it’s true that doing something is better than nothing, we can trick ourselves into thinking we’re making progress when we aren’t doing anything meaningful. When we’re just doing the minimum and checking the small projects off of our To Do lists every day, at a certain point we have to stop and ask ourselves, Am I growing? Am I moving toward my goals…or am I just getting by?"

I was floored.



And it felt like a roundhouse kick to the head.

I always am talking about small changes, something being better than nothing. Heck, I love the whole idea of #wycwyc (what you can, when you can) because it works into my self-proclaimed crazy, busy life. But is it helping me?

I mean it has to be. Something is always better than nothing, right? 


Am I growing?

Am I progressing?

Am I moving towards my goals?  

Jeez, some days I don’t know.

I know that on any given day I can look over the choices I have made and find those that could have been better and those that could have been worse. I mean, hell I preach constantly about balance and 80/20 and never engaging in extreme behaviors. But it’s a fine line, right, between balance and complacency? And I have to stop for a minute and ask myself - am I coasting?

Am I trying to fool myself into believing I am doing enough?

Or worse yet…

Am I starting to trust my weaknesses more so than my strengths?

That’s so easy to do.

So how do I know? I mean seriously though, how can I honestly know I am taking meaningful actions in my life that are helping me reach my goals? 

Am I just following the path of least resistance?

Maybe it shouldn’t be this easy

Or should it?

I wish I knew. 

Love and hugs,